i did better today

i did better today
not being so obsessively compelled
it's about trusting and faith
not so much in the Lord or anything but in
the wisdom of healing and that I'll go whap-backlog if i listen to the carp of my own mind set

i know an exceptionally useful way to be in instant misery

that would be of course to drink alcohol

my mind-mercials tell me otherwise

my sperience tells me misery=drinkering

and when i look at death and don't blink, weep weep
but don't drinkypoo

with a mind like mine, i call it responding they call it reactoring, both =right

i respond and note and give such a highlevel of care
but
they don't want a high level of care given
they want tableaux cleansered and soulsongs snuffered

and i want to shuffle and say I'm georgia-gorgeous

this overjerk and oversmirk
is nothing but healering turned backwards
and so therer is nothing but no one being
awarify
and soft belly , the mediation state of calmness within
my innards want it
and they find the merciless workahaulism repugnant
the end is beachcombing

our agilities we sell them like sheepmongers

there is a robber's coach henchman facet of this working for others
we loose our goals and 'jectives
and work for them(nobel as those might swell be)

and in the interim(our lives unfoldering)
we loosen from our healingsongs and
oops there goes our lifelinetime doubltimed by the twin fears of notnow and who?me?

and i am thinking upon yew

and listening to mantras for releasing not relishing fear so feral

so many old records and books to jettison 'ere i die

THere was a game name of Lander
it was an early generation of 'pewter games
the purpose was to land on the moon with zero gas in your tank and zero mph as your velocity
sounds easy, don't it?
well...
so i would always crasher it
and not for the halibut
but 'cuz i couldnt figure out the so-to-speak rubik's cube formulae of the flight pattern

same thing with
old 45 rpm' records
and musky dusky lusky books

let someone else have 'em,neigh
and go forward
she who dies with the least toys
just her parka,actually
doesn't lose